Arising
by Keiko Kirin

His brain woke him up. Thoughts circling and chasing, filling his head, pulling him from sleep. Words in dead languages, authors of texts. The shape of a bowl, the color of a stone. Puzzles, fragments, syllables, declensions, inflections. And underneath it all, the substance of life: memories, ambitions, regrets, fears. Occasionally distilled into the basic, mundane thoughts of existence.

Jack was right: he thought too much. Daniel slid his glasses on and watched a streak of sunlight reach through the window and reflect off the silver edge of the alarm clock. He thought about light, and reflection, and Jack.

He liked thinking. Thoughts were what he thrived on, what drove him. But Jack was right. Thinking wasn't all there was to living. There was doing: touching, experiencing, being.

And with Jack, it was okay to do, to touch, to experience, to be. Jack understood. Jack knew that for Daniel, it was freefall, and Jack was there to catch him. To let him do, to let him think and do. To let him feel.

Daniel rolled over and faced Jack. Still asleep, incredibly peaceful in sleep. The sunlight was bright and warm today, streaming across the bed and Jack's body. It made his skin look gold. Gold and shadows.

Daniel liked to look before he touched, before he disturbed that incredible peace and turned it into something warmer and more vibrant. He propped up on one elbow and started from the long, narrow foot sticking out from under a wrinkled, messy sheet. The other foot hidden somewhere, a shadow.

The sheet covered too much, although Daniel could visualize it all in his mind: long hairy legs with bony ankles and knees. Bony hips framing a flat middle, somewhat softened (pleasantly so, in Daniel's opinion) with age. A gentle line of hair leading from the navel down to a dark, soft, wiry nest. Curving above one thigh, moderately long even while soft and sleeping, Jack's cock, rising from the heavy, dusky sac of his balls.

Daniel's fingers twitched. He flattened his hand against the mattress and moved his eyes from the shadowed curve, past the edge of the sheet, to Jack's stomach, flat and muscular with just a hint of the developing softness Jack worked so hard on to toughen up. Daniel smiled, resisting the urge to kiss there. Not yet.

His gaze strayed to one hand, resting limp across the bed, palm upward. A rough, calloused palm whose touch Daniel could still feel echoes of across his skin. Long, strong, irrepressible fingers with interestingly prominent joints. Thumb bent and curved in a graceful arc. Bony, strong wrist, and straight, lean forearm. Slightly crooked elbow. The deceptively subtle curve of a bicep.

Daniel followed the sweep of Jack's shoulder down to his chest, its rise and fall barely perceptible. A broad tangle of chest hair cast thin, circling shadows over Jack's skin, clustering around his nipples, temptingly small and peaked. Up breastbone to creased, but firm, neck.

Daniel imagined licking along Jack's jaw to the curve where it joined his ear, then up to nuzzle the short, silver hairs that spread from Jack's temple and blended with layers of dark and light grey. Today Jack's hair stood up in a cowlick, as it often did in the morning. And whisps of it in the front were just long enough to touch Jack's forehead.

Strong brow. Scar. Deep beneath it, closed eyelid and long lashes above a high cheekbone too soft to be severe. The lines in his face. Barest hint of beard on his chin. The nose which would almost be too long, except it curved just right. Almost straight upper lip, and the fuller lower one, always about to smile except when things were really bad. Never looking as soft as Daniel knew they were.

He'd wallowed in this undisturbed indulgence long enough. It was time to disturb. He kissed Jack's lips, his brow, his ear, his shoulder, and both nipples. His restless hand slid under the sheet to cup Jack's balls, to rub and stroke along Jack's dick. He licked Jack's throat, and bit softly just under Jack's ear. Jack's cock twitched in his hand.

Jack made a sleepy, mrmrmmmphing sound. Daniel touched more gently and gave the curve of Jack's neck a lingering, sucking kiss. And was lost in enjoyment when the sheets were kicked away, and Jack slid his arms around him and rolled him onto his back.

Breathless, giddy from Jack's strength catching him off-guard, Daniel laughed softly and ran his hands over Jack's back. Jack gave him a sleepy, affectionate look.

"You were doing it again," he said, quietly accusing.

"I was," Daniel admitted.

"It's kind of unnerving, you know," Jack said, and he balanced on one elbow as he carefully lifted Daniel's glasses off with one hand and set them aside on the table.

Daniel blinked as his eyes refocused. "You should feel flattered." He clasped his hands over the small of Jack's back and rocked to push his hardening cock against Jack's groin, to show him how flattered he should be.

Jack held his shoulders and kissed him. At first gently, slow and easy. Gradually becoming deeper and hungrier. He tightened his arms around Jack, and thrust his tongue into Jack's mouth, needing his taste and his hunger.

He unclasped his hands and spread them over Jack's ass, holding and squeezing, as he pushed up and rubbed his cock against Jack's. Jack's chest hair scrubbed at his skin, softly scratchy. He dragged his legs, trapped under Jack's weight, free, and hugged him between his thighs. Jack ground against him, and devoured his mouth, and dug his fingertips into Daniel's shoulders.

Fire licked at Daniel's skin, down his spine, into his blood, which thumped and pounded in his veins and heart and head and cock. He rocked and Jack thrust, breaking from the kiss with a shudder, his dick hard and heavy against Daniel's.

Daniel loved the feel of this. Jack's strength and energy and passion all focused on this, on him. He was greedy enough to want it, always. And generous enough to show how much. He felt wired and high at the same time, buzzed on Jack and lust.

He lifted one knee, bent his leg back and rubbed it wantonly against Jack's hip. Jack twitched an eyebrow, and his eyes glinted, and he smiled. Daniel lifted his eyebrows and rubbed again. Jack bent down to kiss his neck, to lap and nip at the sensitive spot that made Daniel writhe and thrust demandingly. Jack kissed his ear and nuzzled behind it, and Daniel knew he was smiling from making Daniel wait.

Screw waiting. Daniel flung his arm out and stretched, reaching until his fingertips touched the table. He could almost -- almost -- reach the drawer. Why did he bother putting it in the drawer, anyway? It was inconveniently inaccessible there. He squirmed a little, trying to get a good grip on the drawer.

"Hey, don't pull something," Jack said, sounding amused. Then he bit Daniel's shoulder and kissed his way down Daniel's arm, leaned over and opened the drawer. He fished out the tube and dropped it into Daniel's palm. "Hold this."

Daniel gave him a meaningful blink and opened the tube. Jack balanced on one forearm and kept rocking his hips, stroking Daniel's dick with his, gently pushing the tips together. His balls brushed against Daniel's and Daniel shuddered.

Tube opened, he poured the wet gel over Jack's fingers and stroked them to make them slick, covering his own hand at the same time. Jack shifted, onto his side, and Daniel followed, hooking his leg over and keeping his cock pressed against Jack's.

Jack never teased. He knew how Daniel liked this, how he wanted this. Two fingers pressing in firmly, waiting just long enough, then pushing deep to circle, around and around, rubbing and spreading. Daniel shivered, burning now from wanting and needing, and bent his head to bite Jack's shoulder, lick the salty sweat from his skin. Jack rubbed his cheek against Daniel's hair, breathing hard.

Daniel drew back just enough to reach between them and stroke Jack's dick, pulling up from the base, coating it with wetness, and squeezing the head to mix it with some of Jack's own. Jack's fingers inside him gave a rough thrust and slid out. Daniel licked his lips, breathing harshly, wound tight with anticipation.

Jack patted his ass softly, a sign to wait, and reached back, fumbling for sheet and pillows, bunching them up in the middle of the mattress. Then he gripped Daniel's waist and held him in place as he eased onto his back, hips raised by the pillows. Ah, this way...

Daniel straddled him, leaning over to kiss him once, deeply, and run his hands over Jack's chest. Jack reached between Daniel's legs to hold his cock, guide it along Daniel's cleft until the tip nudged at his hole. Daniel sank back, bringing him inside slowly until Jack let go and slid his hand away, brushing his knuckles against Daniel's balls. Daniel pushed down, and yes, this was it. Jack inside him, filling him, wanting him. Strong and hard and hungry for him.

Daniel sat back and writhed to get perfectly comfortable, eliciting a hissed breath from Jack. Jack ran his hands down Daniel's thighs, scratching softly. Daniel rocked and felt the solid heat of Jack's cock rammed inside him. Ahhh, perfect. Yes. He rose up and pressed down, to feel it still there, always there, so wonderfully hard and full. Sighing, he kept moving, finding a steady, slow rhythm.

Jack was spread out underneath him, watching him with that intimate smile, his fingers sliding up and down Daniel's thighs as Daniel moved. Daniel stared into his eyes and smiled.

"You love this," he said.

"Mm," Jack agreed, still smiling.

Daniel pulled up nearly all the way and pushed back down so hard they both groaned. His prick stood nearly flat against his stomach, throbbing fiercely, the tip wet. He moved a little faster, loving the feel of Jack's cock sliding inside him, back and forth, over and over, more and more.

He inhaled deeply to catch his breath and said, "I can't help noticing, I do all the work."

Jack murmured thickly, "I think I do my share," and thrust his hips up to push deeper. Daniel pressed back and arched, swallowing a moan. Jack wrapped his hand around Daniel's cock and started stroking it, matching Daniel's rhythm.

Oh, this was it. What he wanted, yes. Jack's cock inside him and Jack's hand around him. Hot and rough and moving faster, filling him and pulling him, making his blood catch fire under his skin, inside his veins.

He was rising up and crashing down faster, and faster, harder, so hard his balls slapped against Jack's skin with each thrust down. And Jack was rubbing his cock, faster and harder, jerking on it. Jack bent his knees and lifted his hips and rammed into him. Sweat rolled down Daniel's back, down his chest. The fire was pouring, drenching, through him, through Jack, through him, until...

He slammed down hard to feel Jack's cock piercing him. The fire burst inside him, and he arched, shuddered, writhed. His cock stilled in Jack's hand for a split second before shooting come in thick spatters over Jack's stomach and chest.

The fire left a perfect, sweet burn. He moved again. Yes, Jack. Yes. Jack grabbed his hips, hands sticky with Daniel's come, and held him as he thrust up again, again, then tensed and filled him, flooded him, with thick, liquid heat.

A sweet, sweet burn. Daniel luxuriated in it for a while, holding Jack as long as he could, until Jack slipped softly and wetly from him. Daniel eased himself down, into Jack's arms, tangling their legs together. Jack stroked his back, fingertips gliding down his spine. Daniel rested his cheek on Jack's shoulder and caressed his stomach.

Jack smoothed his hand down Daniel's hip, and over his ass. He gave it a soft squeeze and pat.

"I like it when you do all the work," he murmured.

Daniel raised an eyebrow and patted Jack's nicely softening belly. Jack cupped the back of Daniel's neck and kissed him, slow and nice and delicious.

The sunlight was white gold in Jack's hair. The air was still warm and moist from their sex. The day was new, and thoughts swirled back into his mind with a coolly chaotic structure. And underlying it all, life and doing. It was okay to do. Jack was here.

(the end)

August 28, 2001